Parents can help prevent bullying
Caring adults can prevent teasing and bullying, teachers and parents were told recently by a national speaker brought in by the Riverview Association of Parents and Teachers (RAPT).
Jim Jelinske of Creative Education Services of Dubuque, Iowa, also spoke to Riverview students during his visit to the district Oct. 14 and 15.
Bullying is a series of intentionally and repeated cruel incidents involving the same victim, Jelinske told parents. It is an imbalance of power.
He cautioned parents again making comments such as “ignore it,” “hit them back,” “I’m sure it was just a joke” or “you know how boys are.”
Instead, Jelinske says parents should trust their instincts and:
Take steps to prevent harassment by talking about differences and creating opportunities for children to experience different culture. The most common reason for being picked on: being different.
Model the non-violent behavior they would like to see. Avoid physical punishments.
Teach their children assertive behavior. This can include saying “Please stop,” walking away or trying humor. Children should not isolate or blame themselves.
Don’t allow sibling abuse.
Monitor TV. According to a Media & Values study, the average child is likely to have watched 8,000 on-screen murders and more than 100,000 acts of violence by the end of elementary school.
Always intervene in hurtful behavior. Say, “We don’t do that here,” with “that” referring to anything meant to humiliate or embarrass or hurt.
If your child exhibits bully behavior, take it seriously. Don’t allow bullying at home and reward positive interactions. Explore the reasons for bullying and get help if warranted.
If you suspect your child is a victim, check out the warning signs and document detailed information. Try not to overreact, but report it to the school.
Parents also should be aware of cyberbullying, which uses technology to harass others. Parents should consider the location of their home computers, use of parental controls, and limits on computer usage.
Also teach children not to give our private information, to be careful in exchanging photos and to remember that online conversations are not always private.
One in six students were seriously traumatized by peers in school, according to the National Center for Educational Statistics. Ten percent of students drop out of school because of repeated bullying, according to the National School Safety Center.
Jelinkse says bullying can be significantly reduced in schools if teachers, support staff, parents and, most importantly, students join together to take action against this form of harassment.
Particularly important is bystander intervention, Jelinske said. If the silent majority becomes a caring majority, the climate will change to discourage bullying.
Teach students the difference between tattling to get someone in trouble, and reporting to get someone out of trouble, he said.
Jelinske suggests that each family and each school should emphasize: “Every human being, without exception, has the right to be treated with dignity and respect.”
