Babysitting isn’t supposed to be this much of a workout

In just a couple of hours of babysitting, my oldest grandson out golfed me, outran me, out flew me and outbalanced me.

The only thing he didn’t do was sink me — but only because he ran out of time.

I got an emergency call to watch Ty and his little brother Nolan one morning over the weekend when both of his parents came up with other last-minute obligations.

Apparently, they’d exhausted all their other options — including grabbing the first person that passed by on the street — and were reduced to calling me because Terry was at work.

They didn’t have to ask me twice — I was at their front door, ready to watch the guys, before they would have had a chance to ask a second time.

The last time Terry was there, Ty showed her all the presents he’d gotten for Christmas, plus all the ones Nolan had gotten — even though Christmas had long passed and even including all the presents we had given them, which obviously we had already seen.

Apparently, enough time has passed since Christmas by now that I didn’t get the Christmas present tour from Ty.

Instead, we finished watching the television show he was in the middle of and then broke out the Wii video game for a little friendly intergenerational competition.

We have our own Wii game at home, so at least I was familiar with how it works. All that meant was that I had to come up with a different excuse when Ty whipped me at all the different games.

He started off with a trip to the golf driving range, although he took most of the shots. If he’d ever seen me actually play golf, he probably would have given me more time on the driving range, so he could pile up the yardage and accuracy on me.

Instead, he took plenty of shots and then, after seeing just a few of my feeble efforts, was ready to move on to something else where he figured he could easily best me as well.

He decided I needed to try out a few of the fitness exercises. I’m not sure if he was trying to make some kind of sly comment about my physical prowess — or more accurately, lack thereof — but I’d like to think he’s still too young for that kind of thing. When he’s older and more cynical — that is to say, when he’s a teenager — then that might be the case.

He put me through a few stretching exercises, but fortunately not for very long. That was a good thing, because I’m not sure if he’s learned to call 911 yet — and a few more minutes of that would have required that skill on his part.

We tried a little road running but Ty soon got bored waiting for me to catch up — how humiliating is it when a five-year-old laps you three or four times on a television screen — and moved on to some other games.

They included one where you had to pretend you’re a bird and fly from place to place, and another where you’re encased in a big bubble and you have travel down a river by moving the bubble backwards, forwards, right and left.

To say I got nowhere in either of those games would be to give me more credit than I actually earned. I didn’t know that Wii games actually kept score in negative numbers, but apparently they do.

Nolan would watch us for a while and then wander off to amuse himself with one of his toys. He seemed to be content to have me come and see what toy he’d found while Ty was taking his turn on the Wii, so things went well in that regard.

Ty had apparently tired of humiliating his poor grandfather at the Wii Fit games, so he decided to bring out a Titanic game to play.

In this game, you take the role of a passenger getting ready to sail on the doomed ocean liner and solve various puzzles along the way.

We were the young bride of an English gentleman sailing to America and had to figure out how to get our boarding pass from a little urchin who had lifted it from us.

That took long enough that Ethan was back home before the ship even left harbor, so I never got to find out if we went down with the Titanic or were saved.

We’ll have to save that for the next time I come over. Hopefully, there will be enough time before that that I can whip myself into Wii shape and can actually beat Ty at some of his games. Of course, that would probably take until he actually is a teenager — but I can wait.